By the power of Roy and Norris

Rich Gubby — Thu, 30 Jul 2009 20:39:04 +0000

As discussed in previous cream cracker World Record attempt posts, I want to be known as the fastest cream cracker eater in the west. And in the east too because if you can’t conquer both, you can’t be a world record holder.

I’ve been practicing for a while to get my technique right but attempt #1 went pretty badly. The last time I checked the record was at 47 seconds and I stopped the clock as it went sailing past the minute marker. I felt that not only had I let everyone else down, but I’d let myself down. I’d done a Greg Louganis and that elusive world record just seemed miles away.

But last night I thought I’d give it a last go before hanging up my boots (crackers).

And I only went and bloomin did it! 46.27 seconds. Eat that Ambrose Mendy. In. Your. Face.

Ok. So it wasn’t under test conditions, I hadn’t got lab technicians in white coats timing it to the exact split second and I probably had a trailing wind behind me, but it’s the first time in this attempt that I’ve gone below 50 seconds!

I think I’ve found my magic formula and I will be making another attempt tonight just to make sure that it wasn’t a fluke (or the stopwatch app on my phone isn’t dodgy).

Red Yellow » jacobs cream crackers

By the power of Roy and Norris